Educating Pork PL · Gameweek 4 · Final v1.3
15 September 2026
The gameweek report
Tineka takes the honours as Ian takes the express lift down
One point settles the weekly prize. Ivo stays top, Green Street returns to third, and Calvert-Lewin makes several benches deeply uncomfortable.
The league table
On a small screen, swipe the table sideways to see every column.
| # | TEAM / MANAGER | GW4 | TOTAL | MOVE |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Ivo Ferreira | 87 | 275 | — |
| 2 | RDRed Djed Redemption Ryan Hindle | 84 | 267 | — |
| 3 | Robert Ayres | 77 | 252 | ▲2 |
| 4 | Candace Van Damme | 80 | 250 | ▲2 |
| 5 | Aubrey Hindle | 76 | 242 | ▲3 |
| 6 | AABCDEFC Tineka Bishop | 88 | 240 | ▲4 |
| 7 | TBThe Balon D'orgus Dela Avle | 64 | 240 | ▼3 |
| 8 | CCclarkys cloggers Paul Clark | 68 | 237 | ▼1 |
| 9 | Ian Gpowell | 55 | 229 | ▼6 |
| 10 | Hailey Hindle | 64 | 222 | ▼1 |
| 11 | Peter Mossad | 61 | 210 | — |
| 12 | Steve Fletcher | 59 | 168 | — |
| 13 | VBVermilion Bird Portia Pavia | 80 | 80 | DEBUT |
| 14 | Angelo Pavia | 77 | 77 | DEBUT |
GW4 shows gross points. Weekly honours use net scores: Ian’s 55 becomes 51 after his four-point hit; everyone else had no hit. Overall totals already include costs. Tineka and Dela are level on points; the table retains FPL’s ordering.
The pig has changed hands
Tineka Bishop has completed the sort of turnaround that makes keeping old newsletters a public service. Two Gameweeks after collecting the Pork Chop, she has produced 88 points and won the week by one. The gardening can wait. ABCDEFC has rediscovered a considerably more enjoyable way to spend the weekend.
This was a proper team performance rather than one expensive footballer dragging ten passengers across the line. Groß supplied the flourish, the defence supplied the foundations, and Calvert-Lewin arrived on Monday with the contribution that pushed Tineka above Ivo. Last week’s Wildcard is beginning to look like a renovation with planning permission rather than somebody knocking walls down because the kitchen felt unlucky.
There was one final indignity tucked inside the victory. Tineka appeared fifth in the post-match snapshot, only for Aubrey’s automatic substitution to lift Boo Tottenham above her once processing finished. She ends sixth, up four places, with the weekly trophy intact. FPL apparently felt that letting somebody enjoy absolutely everything would set a dangerous precedent.
Ivo keeps the keys; Ryan keeps knocking
Ivo Ferreira missed the weekly prize by the smallest possible margin, but retained the considerably more important view from the top. João Pedro captain, Groß and Raya made This is the Wirtz! difficult to live with; Neco Williams then arrived from the bench to bring the final score within touching distance of Tineka. Close enough to be irritating. Not close enough to take the trophy.
The lead is now eight points over Ryan Hindle, up from five after GW03. Ryan’s recovery from last week’s Pork Chop was substantial, with a defence that gave Red Djed Redemption something to build on. Gvardiol proved a useful purchase. Palmer captain was less decisive, and the return to respectability came with the knowledge that Calvert-Lewin’s double-figure haul had been left among the substitutes.
Robert Ayres returned Green Street United to third without a transfer or chip, helped by João Pedro captain and Calvert-Lewin’s Monday contribution. Candace Van Damme remains only two behind after another productive CVD FC week, with Groß and Tavernier providing support. The pair have improved their positions, but the leading duo still has a useful cushion. There is work to do before either can turn this into an argument about the title.
Paul Clark, meanwhile, has finally allowed somebody else to win a Gameweek. His 68 matched his previous weekly score, but this time it left clarkys cloggers below the overall FPL average of 69 and down a place. The same answer, a much less forgiving exam. Groß kept the performance upright; Palmer’s armband never supplied the extra shove.
Manager Spotlight: Portia Pavia
Portia Pavia — Vermilion Bird. There are several ways to introduce yourself to a fantasy league. Arriving with a goalkeeper and back four responsible for 57 of your 80 points is one of the more persuasive. Portia’s first scoring week was built from the back, then given a rather emphatic finishing touch by Bogle on Monday.
The encouraging part is how much of the side contributed without requiring a captaincy rescue. Isak’s armband returned four, but Raya, Gabriel, Tarkowski and Gvardiol had already given Vermilion Bird a platform. Bogle’s haul turned a respectable debut into a share of the fourth-highest weekly score. The attacking department should probably keep its contribution to the post-match discussion brief.
There was still something left in reserve, but this was no spectacular bench disaster masquerading as squad depth. Portia’s low overall position reflects a GW04 start, not an uncompetitive team. One week cannot establish a contender; it can establish that the rest of the league ought to pay attention. Consider the introduction made.
The armband and the receipt
Ivo, Rob and Steve Fletcher share Captain Fantastic: João Pedro’s 12 doubled to 24. The Haaland captainers received a respectable 18; Ryan and Paul collected ten from Palmer. Ian, Dela, Portia and Angelo chose Isak and received four. It was a particularly expensive-looking way to discover that captaincy does not reward the strength of your conviction.
Ian Gpowell’s version came with an actual invoice. He brought in Isak and Gomez for Furo and Palmer, paid the only four-point hit in the league and entrusted his new striker with the armband. The two arrivals’ raw returns matched those of the departures before the fee; that comparison alone does not capture the entire selection, but it hardly provides the recruitment team with a celebratory slide.
Roefs and M. Sangaré supplied six points through automatic substitutions, softening the damage without changing the verdict. Sendmetocoventry finishes on 51 net, lowest in the league, and falls from third to ninth. The Pork Chop is Ian’s. After consecutive Gameweeks containing a four-point hit, the league is entitled to ask whether the transfer button should come with a cooling-off period.
Dela Avle also bought Isak and Cherki, though his two transfers were free. Ryan’s Shaw-to-Gvardiol move was the happier immediate story. Paul replaced Bruno with Palmer and captained him, while Candace bought Konsa only to leave his useful return on the bench. Nobody played a chip this week; the drama was achieved without pressing any of the large emergency buttons.
The bench has the last laugh
Last week, this column gave Candace and Hailey Hindle considerable grief for benching Mitchell. Both started him this time. He returned one point. Fantasy football is a vindictive little bastard, and the timing was impeccable.
The actual Bench of Shame belongs to Dela, with 17: Calvert-Lewin’s ten and Kinsky’s seven. Every member of his starting XI played, so there was no reprieve waiting in the processing queue. He ends level with Tineka on overall points but three places lower than where he started the week. Owning the answer does not help much if you leave it folded in your pocket.
Ryan also left Calvert-Lewin unused. Pedro Porro’s absence brought on Diop, not the striker at the back of the queue, and the ten remained stranded. Ivo’s settled bench total was 16, enough for another uncomfortable mention but no trophy. Those totals are unused reserve points, not a promise that they could all legally have been added to the XI.
Aubrey Hindle had a more agreeable encounter with the substitution rules. Anderson replaced Keane, supplied five and lifted Boo Tottenham into fifth. After the earlier Haaland bench saga, starting the Norwegian, captaining him and accepting useful help from the reserves amounts to a remarkably sensible weekend. We shall try not to make him self-conscious about it.
Elsewhere, the defence is doing the talking
Angelo Pavia opened with 77, matching Rob, and also built his score on a productive defence. Portia and Angelo’s low overall positions reflect their GW04 starts; both made competitive debuts, despite having three fewer scoring weeks than most of the field.
Hailey’s Monday return from Calvert-Lewin and Wissa improved matters without preventing Park the Bus slipping a place. She finished level with Dela on the week, though the overall gap remains substantial. Peter Mossad stayed eleventh after another bout of squad adjustment: Havertz and Ødegaard arrived, but their combined return did little to transform Mikel Arteta’s Army. Yalcouyé offered more encouragement; Ampadu’s seven remained on the bench.
Steve got the captaincy right and still had a difficult week. AFC Kincardine’s remaining Monday starters supplied little, while the goalkeeper and bench offered no rescue. It is a useful reminder that the right armband can give a side a chance without making the rest of it disappear.
GW04 honours board
On a small screen, swipe the table sideways to see every column.
| Manager of the Week | Tineka | 88 net. Wins by one; the Pork Chop rehabilitation is complete. |
| Performance of the Week | Tineka | Up four places with no GW04 transfers or chip. |
| Captain Fantastic | Ivo / Rob / Steve | João Pedro ×2 = 24. |
| Pork Chop | Ian | 51 net and six places lost. The receipt is attached to the pig. |
| Bench of Shame | Dela | 17 unused reserve points. |
| What Were You Thinking? | Dela / Ryan | Calvert-Lewin’s ten left on both benches. |
| Biggest Climber | Tineka | Tenth to sixth. |
| Biggest Fall | Ian | Third to ninth. |
| Transfer Gambler | Ian | Two moves; the league’s only four-point hit. |
What we’ve learned
Tineka’s turnaround is a useful argument for letting a new squad breathe. Ryan’s response shows that a Pork Chop need not become a subscription. Ian’s week demonstrates that paying to change your mind does not oblige the new plan to work. And Mitchell has reminded the entire league that learning last week’s lesson can still produce this week’s punchline.
Heading into GW05, the questions are about decisions rather than slogans. Can Rob and Candace close on the leading pair without getting distracted by each other? Can Dela find a starting XI that uses more of what he owns? Can Ian recover without another invoice? Nobody’s next transfer is known. Fortunately, there is already more than enough evidence to make the next round interesting.
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